3 ways to tap into your intuition

Becoming a mother requires that you activate your superpowers. The ability to tap into your intuition is one of them. The ability to make decisions based solely on your gut, holy spirit, intuition or whatever you’d like to call it; and the ability to be confident that you have made the right decision requires practice.

Shut The F*&K Up!

The first thing you need to do is shut up.  You cannot hear your intuition if you are always flapping your gums or thinking (which is mentally flapping your gums). You must learn to be still and listen. Find a quiet a spot, I always recommend sitting on the floor for grounding purposes, acknowledge your intuition and ask it to help you make a decision. Start with a small specific question and then work up to the larger more critical decisions. It will take time to differentiate between your own voice and your intuition. Here is a tip, your intuition will only vibrate at the level of love, it is you God consciousness. Any answer that does not have love at the center is not your intuition leading you. Your intuition will never tell you to do harm but it will protect you from harm.

Listen To Your Gut.

Secondly, learn your body. That uneasy feeling you get in your stomach when a sketchy person walks in the room or when the hair on your arms or the back of your neck stand up. What was going on the last time you got goose bumps? These are physical signs of your intuition talking to you. Your body is responding involuntarily and the responses are information. Listen to your body. Click To Tweet

Get Free Writing.

Lastly, free write. One of my favorite books, The Artist’s Way  explains free writing and provides exercises, I highly recommend reading it.  Free write for five minutes, brain dump everything without thinking about or evaluating it. Do not worry about punctuation, grammar or spelling. Simply get the words on the paper. Set a timer. When the timer goes off get a clean sheet of paper. Ask your intuition a specific question, a superficial one. Try the free writing for 90 days before asking it about the tough stuff.  After you have asked your intuition to guide you, allow the answer to come through you onto the paper without thinking too hard or judging what is is being written. I recommend having a journal specifically for free writes and another for answers from your intuition. Let me know if these tips helped you and share with me if you have a different way of tapping into your intuition. I’d love to read about it in the comments.

 

Continue Reading

7 Unusual Facts about a Fat Black Yogi

Even though I call myself a yogi I don’t really know what that means. I’m really not a Zen kind of person but I am always seeking enlightenment. Suppression of my rage is a daily fight. Rage is depression in Shango clothing. I’m on a life long journey to tame my crazy. Here’s the tea: only when you surrender to your rage, allowing yourself to feel it completely, will you find ways to calm it. Rage requires patience and diplomacy. Here are some unusual facts about me as I learn to manage mine:

    1. In yoga teacher training during our lesson about the Yamas and Niyamas, I was battling gnats. While learning the life principle Ahimsa/nonviolence, I was smacking the sh*t out of gnats. I am not a nature girl. I appreciate nature’s beauty and wonder but I prefer to appreciate it from the window of my air conditioned home. I want to challenge myself this coming year. I’ve considered hiking. I will let you know how that goes. If I’m lucky, a side effect will be a change in my body; which brings me to the second unusual fact….

      look at my cute cute & color!
      look at my cute cut & color!
    2. I gained the thirty pounds back that I lost after giving birth to the short person. On this side of the emotional pendulum I have less discipline. I’m not practicing Tapas. I let my sweet tooth run wild. Instead of doing more yoga, I do none- unless I’m teaching. And now here I am as the fat belly Buddha. I know clients feel anxiety and consider getting a refund when they see that a chunky black lady with a pot belly will be leading their practice. And my ego -(another thing I am  working on) is pleased when clients end up panting, surprised and satisfied by the time savasana finally rolls around.

      follow me on snap chat @akingsma
      follow me on snap chat @akingsma
    3. I may curse while leading you through your practice. I have a potty mouth and I am really not working on that. Om shanti.
    4. My biggie yoga pants are my favorite. Clients can predict what type of class we are going to have when I’m rocking them. biggie-revised
    5. I’m a seafood junkie and I wear fur. If I’m not eating meat it’s because of my waistline not compassion for farm animals.”Tell peta my mink is dragging on the floor.”
    6. Ever since the election my personal yoga practice has suffered. Winter time plus my disappointment in America has heightened my seasonal affect disorder. I am no longer feeling innovative or experimental.  To fill up my bag of tricks, I find unique poses on instagram and try them out in yoga class. Sometimes the clients and I are practicing an asana for the first time together in class.

      My petty white woman game is strong!
    7. I belong to the mommy gang that is too hard on ourselves because we are comparing ourselves to an instagram highlight reel. I see you with all your imperfections. You see me with all of mine. But we are perfect in our children’s eyes and we must remember this! At least until they get into middle school and start judging us. Be present for every moment, even the times that are painful.

Namaste,

Thembi

Continue Reading

The Importance of a Safe Space for mother and child

Last week I went to a meet and greet for Ms. Wright’s Way. Ashley Wright is a breast-feeding, baby wearing, bed sharing and using common sense advocate. I follow her on all her social media except for Facebook. I am on a timeout from Facebook until further notice. You can still catch me on twitter and Instagram. My favorite right now is snap chat. The best stories are told there.

ashley-wright

It is not often that I can get out to do things alone. If I’m going somewhere then the short person has to go too. Everything ain’t for everybody so often times I opt out of things because it’s not child friendly. Wright offered a space that children could come and for FREE. The opportunity to fellowship with liked minded people is a blessing. Having your kid invited is your blessing pressed down and running over. We met at the Madison House in DC. It’s a home turned boutique and a mental health safe space. I bought two cute amethyst crystals from there.

amethyst

I heard a new part of Wright’s story during the meet and greet which is her’s to tell. I will just say bad-asses are made by the circumstance of their lives and I salute them.

The short person had plenty of other children to play with. The roar of the children often got louder than Wright. But she didn’t miss a beat, she kept talking and engaging with us as if she weren’t in a volume battle with banshee.

The energy in the place was sweet; accurately defining Wright’s following as “the village”. I introduced myself to Ashley Wright since I had driven 45 minutes from my Virginia suburban home. My “hey Ashley”, was met with a look of familiarity and a warm embrace. Pause for the super sweet sister moment.

village

I hope more entrepreneurs learn that there is a market for events that are child friendly. I pay an exorbitant amount of money in gym fees because it includes daycare. Dear yoga studios, please get hip to this.

I am taking notes and learning from every event I attend trying to turn my side joint into my main joint. If I ever invite you to something or ask you to pay to come see me; best believe the kid(s) can come too.

Be better.
Do better.
Namaste.

Continue Reading

4 things to do when you’re in a creative rut.

Consume art © Copyright 2010 CorbisCorporation

This feels very indulgent and like a waste of time but it works. Watch movies, specifically ones that you have no interest in. For me that would mean watching Captain America. I’m not a comic book head unless you include Archie. I prefer dramatic movies and comedies. Also, search Netflix. I discovered several movies that won awards at Sundance but never made it to the movie theatre. There is a genre of independent black filmmakers with limited budgets and great imaginations. Find them and be inspired.

Re-read books or buy new ones. I am currently re-reading the Artist Way, The Alchemist, Secrets of a Millionaire Mind, and Sacred Woman. All of these books are tattered and falling apart. This means I refer to them as needed. Your library doesn’t have to be vast but it must be dense. Books of great substance are necessary and you should be able to return to them as a reference.  My summer reading list includes Big Magic, Conscious Capitalist,  and Year of Yes. Consume books. Turn off the TV and read. I recommend a physical book which requires you to turn pages instead of swiping your finger.

Listen to musicjazz

I recommend listening to live music, whether it be jazz, go-go or reggae. Dance to live instruments , it builds fire in the body and draws out the kundalini energy. If you can’t find your way to live music then listen to music without lyrics. This stimulates the part of the brain that inspires creativity. Without lyrics you can decide for yourself what story it is telling. You can focus in on one instrument or you can notice how sweet the instruments sound collectively. Music without lyrics gets the blood flowing in the brain. Defeating the rut requires movement/action.

Ritualtake-comfort-in-ritual

Even if you are not religious you must have some type of ritual that counters negativity. If you are religious you already have things in your arsenal. I will speak to the religious folks first. Whatever your prayer life is right now, up the ante. It is time to work overtime. Schedule prayer into your day. Set alarms on your phone as reminders. Ding!, says my phone “drink water, stretch, pray.”

Express your concerns to God. Let him know where you are frustrated and blocked. Let him know that you trust him to give you the tools to conquer this problem. Then wait for the answer, this happens in meditation. Then declare it as done-affirmation.

For my folks who don’t subscribe to any religion and aren’t certain if there is a God, get a journal. Free write for one minute. Use a timer. No judgment, grammar be damned and no self editing. Simply write. Then write what you want to manifest. Write a clear and specific declaration.

Example:

I am filled with new ideas. I have 2 months worth of new content ready to be published on my blog.

I earn additional income each month with online classes, book sales and yoga workshops. I declare that I have the creativity, discipline and follow through to make this happen.

 

Free write and write your declarations for 21 days straight. You will start to see things turn around for you before the 21 days are over but don’t stop the ritual, continue for 21 days.

Have sex sex image

If you are in a committed, safe and loving relationship. Get it in! Often! Remember that kundalini energy I wrote about earlier? Orgasms ignite the energy that is responsible for euphoria. Great art happens in extremes. In times of great depression & sadness or in times of great joy. I deal in the light so I’m an advocate of creating joy filled.

If you do not have a partner, no need to worry. Get to know yourself in a real intimate way. Use toys, imagery, and/or your own hand just make sure you enjoy yourself, and do it often. The frequency matters because we are trying to pull ourselves out of a rut. This requires work. But, this work is fun!

I hope you get back to creating great things soon and remember this blog is here for you if you ever find yourself in the creative valley again.

Remember, I love you and want the best for you,

A King’s Ma

 

Continue Reading

This is 39

This is the last year of my thirties. I am officially adulting. 40 is grown woman status. These years have provided some wisdom. Like auntie Oprah, these are the thing I know for sure on my 39th orbit around the sun:

My resting b!tch face has served me well. Instead of 39, I look 29. Some of this is due to genetics and lifestyle but duly note that I have no laugh or frown lines. The stillness in my face that you mistake as pissy is an ancient secret for preserving youth. Thank you rbf.

Dear hoteps (they were called “conscious” back in my day), I am changing the game. I was your prey for far too many years. I am not a victim, I was a willing participant but I am no longer under the spell of your patriarchal/homophobic black power rhetoric. I was not placed here just to grow your seed, cook your food and give your offspring African names. Guess what? I sometimes dye my hair blond. Build a bridge and get over it. It has nothing to do with me having Eurocentric standards of beauty or holding Beynonsense as the standard of black beauty. Not that I owe you an explanation or anything, but gray hair is easier to cover with light color than dark. Fewer touch-ups. Vanity runs in my family, it’s in the genes. Understand fake Farrakhan  that my hair color has to do with looking forever youthful. And don’t y’all love a young and tender thoroughbred (but she gotta have natural hair though,right)? Y’all still giving Dr. Umar money for his school?  I was just wondering.

Gossip is for middle school. If you are in your thirties and still engaging in gossip I’m going to pray for you. Please know that the same people that you are dishing the tea with will be airing your dirty laundry soon after. A gossip cannot be trusted. I can’t be friends with people I cannot trust. I’m too old to make new friends. Just kidding, not really. Don’t be a gossip.

Black people need to figure out ways to tame our crazy. Trust me, I understand we have plenty of things that drive us to madness. But we can choose not to go. Mental illness is a real thing in our community. You can’t church it away, pray  it away, intellectualized it away, or call it a white people thing. It must be addressed as the disease that it is. I recommend combining ancient ways and modern medicine. We are a product of both. Exercise, diet and lifestyle can help. But if necessary, take the damn pills. Yoga tames my crazy, and I am so grateful for this tool!

39 pic

You can be a mother and still have dreams of your own. Do not sacrifice yourself, your happiness or your sanity for motherhood. Martyrdom is played out like trap music. No, that’s just wishful thinking. But really, Jesus was the last human sacrifice. Figure out a way to parent effectively and still do things that bring you joy. Fight for your happiness. It is the only thing worth fighting for. You are a mother. You know magic.

Namaste.

Find out more about how I recovered from hoteps in my new ebook:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B014ojew2e

 

Continue Reading